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what to buy for a lingerie shower

At its best, planning a lingerie shower is incredibly fun. After all, it’s an honor to have the opportunity to celebrate the bride and shower them with a plethora of pretty new underpinnings.

At its worst, though, planning a lingerie shower can be a tad stressful. Where should you throw it? What information do you need to include on the invitations? How many activities do you need to plan? These are just a few of the questions that may arise while you’re putting the shower together.

But don’t fret — this checklist of do’s and don’ts should help you to plan the perfect shower (without all the hassles and headaches).


Do send out the invitations at least a month in advance.

It’s important to give guests plenty of time to check their calendars, request off work if need be, and make travel plans. So be sure to send out the invitations between four and eight weeks before the actual event. Also, include an RSVP date on the invite so that you can get an accurate headcount ASAP.

Do include the bride’s sizes in the invitation.

Aside from the obvious details (date, time, location), the most important thing to include on the invitations are the bride’s sizes. Make sure you have their sizes for not only bras (both band and cup), but also panties and sleepwear/loungewear (S, M, L, etc.). Rather than including this info directly on the invitation, print it onto a separate insert that you can slip inside. If you provide guests with the bride’s sizes, the bride is less likely to have to return items because they don’t fit.

Do give guests a little guidance.

If the bride is very particular about her lingerie, they might want to compile a registry. That way, invitees can shop directly from the wishlist. If the bride does create a lingerie registry, you’ll obviously want to include a link to it on the invitation. This helps to not only guide guests in their purchasing decisions but also lessens the risk that two people accidentally buy the same item. If the bride doesn’t want to open a registry, you can still help point guests in the right direction by offering up the names of a few of their favorite stores, and you can include these suggestions on the invitation. Or, you might include a few descriptors for guests to stick to when shopping. For example, adding a theme on the invitation like “hot honeymoon” or “classy date night” might be helpful for attendees.

Do make sure the location offers privacy.

Most lingerie showers tend to be hosted in someone’s home (such as the bride’s, the maid of honor’s, or another friend’s). That said, you can definitely throw a lingerie shower in another location. However, the most important factor to consider is privacy. The bride will be opening up underthings, after all, and may not feel comfortable doing that in certain public places. You can certainly rent out a private room at a restaurant, but remember that wait staff will still be coming in and out of the room to refill drinks, etc. One alternative option is to have it at a lingerie boutique. Some independent shops will allow you to reserve the store for a block of time, and turn the shower into a shopping party. Or, if you’re planning a very intimate lingerie shower with a small group of ladies, you might rent out an elegant hotel room.

Do consider a goody bag or giveaway.

It’s definitely not required — but putting together a goody bag or giveaway is a fun way to thank guests for coming. If you go the goody bag route, consider a satchel with one pair of panties, a scented sachet for their lingerie drawer, chocolates, and a mini bottle of bubbly. Or, if you’re doing a giveaway, you might have guests guess how many pairs of panties are in a vase or a jar, and the one who’s guess is the closest gets a robe, PJ set, or a gift card to a lingerie store.

Related: The Best Places To Shop For A Lingerie Shower Gift


Don’t invite everyone.

Compiling the guest list is a very different task for a lingerie shower than it is for a traditional shower. Think about it this way: The bride is going to be unwrapping some sexy unmentionables, and they may not want to do that in front of their mother-in-law or grandma. Remember: If they’re having two showers, they definitely don’t have to invite everyone to both. So ask the bride who they’re comfortable with attending before sending out the invites. The lingerie shower tends to be a smaller, more intimate affair, and can even be combined with the bachelorette party if desired.

Don’t let guests think they have to buy gifts for both showers.

Very often, if a bride is having two showers, the guest list will look quite different for each. However, if there is some overlap in terms of who’s invited, make sure that guests know they’re not obligated to buy multiple gifts. Guests who are invited to both a traditional shower and lingerie shower should know that they can choose which one they bring a gift to.

Don’t forget to plan some games just in case.

Even if you don’t think you’ll need them, it’s a great idea to have a few games or activities on deck just in case. This is especially true if some or many of the attendees don’t know each other, as games can act as spectacular ice breakers. Whether it’s lingerie bingo, pin the panty on the bride, or a lingerie-themed cookie decorating station, the possibilities are endless. One particularly popular activity is to have guests anonymously give the bride their gifts, and then the bride has to guess who brought what.

Planning a lingerie shower definitely requires some time, effort, and careful consideration. But by taking these do’s and don’ts into account, you can make sure that it’s a shower both the bride and the guests remember fondly.

Related: The 7 Golden Rules Of Lingerie Shopping

We Highly Recommend

Whether you’re shopping for new everyday bras or lingerie for a special occasion, it’s always a good idea to seek out a second opinion. We know how hard it is to find bras that fit well and feel good, especially when you’re doing it on your own. If you’ve ever felt unsure about your bra size or you just don’t know where to go to find good bras, it’s time to let a bra fitter help.

Many specialty lingerie boutiques offer bra fittings. Their expert bra fitters will take the pain and frustration out of bra shopping and do all the work for you. Even better, their product knowledge can save you time and money. Plus, they know where all of the best bras are hiding.

If you’ve struggled with finding bras in the right size, it’s time to make a change. Visit our specialty store locator to find a store near you and schedule an appointment.

Happy bra shopping!

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Published by

Rebecca Strong

Rebecca is a Boston-based freelance writer who focuses on style, fitness, food, and travel. She has contributed to such publications as HuffPost, Elite Daily and U.S. News & World Report. When she's not writing, she can be found at home or in the studio working on the songs for her upcoming album. Her favorite bra is a black demi-cup style with all-over-lace — timeless and feminine.

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