I am a bit of a self-proclaimed control freak.  This weekend I flew to Melbourne for 5 days, on my own, leaving hubby and Mr 3 at home for the first time, and of course the fear of not having control over organising them for the week sent me into a bit of a tailspin.  So, what does a control freak do in that instance?  Control as much as possible before going of course!  All of their meals were organised – yes ALL of them.  Six dinners planned out complete with sides, and 5 lunches each arranged and ready.  There were 5 piles of little kindy uniforms complete with socks and jocks sitting in my son’s bedroom.  His swimming bag for next Saturday’s lesson packed, including spare clothes.  I repeated feeding and toileting and sleeping instructions for our puppy to hubby more than once – even though he knows exactly what to do.  See the problem is not that they won’t manage, because of course they will!  My husband is more than capable of running the house for a week without me (I think!).  The problem is that I have an incessant desire to control the things I care about.

I don’t always believe this is a ‘bad’ thing, however sometimes it is exhausting and not needed. It has only been in recent times that I have been able to identify when I am doing it to extremes, and reflect upon why.  I believe there are three main reasons for doing so.

1.  I care about those around me, and as such, like to do things for them to save them the trouble of doing it themselves.

2.  I know if I control things by doing them, it will probably be done quicker, easier and dare I say the way I like the to be done – yeah, I know how that sounds!

3.  More than anything, there is this deep fear inside that if I loosen my grip and leave things to trust, something bad might happen.

That is the truth of the matter.  Control freaks are scared shitless.   And I don’t necessarily mean something ‘bad’ as in someone will get dangerously hurt, but bad can mean ‘anything different to how we the outcome to be’.  If you are a self-proclaimed control freak like me, please know that you don’t have to be, you can change your story.  I am!  It is okay to not have control over everything – in fact it is better than okay! Despite my antics in preparation for my trip (baby steps sister!), I am learning to let go and trust more and more.  Trust in those around you.  Trust in the universe.  They won’t let you fall.  Unless you need to of course…

Rebecca Campbell in Rise Sister Rise: A Guide to Unleashing The Wise, Wild Woman Within says, “Beneath every control freak there is a fear of letting go, a fear of not being supported, held and looked after”.  And ain’t that the truth?  Really, truly.  If you have a tendency to try and control many things in your life (for me it is most often regarding work and my son), sit with those feelings about control, and then ponder the idea of what might happen, or how you might feel, if you didn’t have to control everything.  How liberating!  And not only for you, but for those around you.  Instead of taking control over every situation, let some of them go.  Let you partner/friend/child take back their own power and do the things they are very capable of doing themselves.  It may do wonders for their confidence!

Trust that someone (or something) has your back.  You can’t control everything and it’s not often much fun trying to. Be a little more spontaneous.  Share responsibilities.  Simply leave things up to the universe every once in a while.  Ditch the control freak mask gorgeous, you look so much more free and relaxed without it!

Feature image via Stocksnap

{Editor’s Note: This blog post is not sponsored by, affiliated with, or associated with any of the brands, books, or businesses mentioned in this post.}

We live in an era where living is so expensive.  By the time we pay for mortgages/rent, utilities, transport, healthcare, food and the seemingly endless other things that empty our purses each month, it often doesn’t leave a lot left over for what I like to call ‘the pretty things’.  You know, dresses, shoes, bags and the like!  A friend recently asked me ‘how can I make an extra $300 this month to buy something I really want’.  Rather than work harder for it, why not save it elsewhere?  Here is how you can do it next time you are eyeing off something pretty that might not fit into your normal budget!

1.  Ditch the takeaway coffee and make it at home

Parfait Lucie Unlined Wire Bra and Lucie Brief

Now, I have to confess that I am not a coffee drinker, however my sister is a coffee lover and I know she needs her hit daily on the way to work.  If you opt to make your own at home you can save yourself a bundle!  Takeaway coffee = $4.50 VS homemade coffee = $0.50 – $1 (5 days a week).

Monthly savings ~ $75

2.  Visit your local farmer market

Fruit, vegetables, honey, eggs, you name it, and you can probably find it at a local market direct from a farmer somewhere nearby.   By buying direct you not only save money, but the environmental footprint is much smaller, and often you can find produce with less chemicals, or even organic.  When we buy our fresh produce from the farmer market instead of a supermarket each week, we save anywhere between $30 and $40.

Monthly saving ~ $140

3.  Swap the yoga studio for your lounge room

Do you know that there is an abundance of amazing yoga tutorials on YouTube?  From beginner classes, to 30 day challenges, to some intensive practices for the hardcore yogi – you want it they’ve got it!  And guess what?  It’s FREE!  And, you can do it from the comfort of your own home saving you the hassle of going out in the weather, driving across town (so you will save on gas too!) and having to brush your hair!  At approximately $20 a week, your class fees added up in no time!

Monthly saving ~ $80

Of course, you may totally love going to yoga each week for an hour of bliss time – I get it!  And if it is something you love, I don’t suggest giving it up indefinitely.  However, next time you see a beautiful dress that you know you would feel amazing in, but just can’t see how you could fit it into your budget this month, consider some easy short term switches so you can make that dress yours!

Feature image via Parfait

I had a huge realisation recently, an epiphany moment, about how many things I do (or don’t do!) simply due to other people’s expectations and the fear I have regarding their reaction if I don’t pander to those expectations.  And to be honest, I can’t believe it has taken me this long to really truly see it, and realise how much I have been suppressing simply because those around me may do things differently, and may not understand or care for what I want to do.  Well enough is enough.  It is time to just do me.

Can you recall a time you really wanted to do something, or wear something, or were even interested in something a little different to your friends, but chose not to act on it for fear of being judged?  During my recent epiphany, I realised just how much I have done exactly that over the past 15+ years.  I have never really been a ‘sheep’ that followed the crowd, and although I have certainly been truer to myself than ever before over the past few years, there are still silly things that I have been too afraid to do despite wanting to.  Things like dancing in front of people, in any way I choose.  Or embracing my spiritual side and practicing rituals that I have been longing to do for so long.  Even listening to certain music, or singing, or wearing certain clothes.  It’s crazy when I start to think about it!

When people have known you for some time, or believe that you are part of a certain social circle or profession, they can have certain expectations about your behaviour and appearance.  We may even have these expectations about ourselves!  If we have always done things a certain way and all of a sudden want to try something new, it can be a little bit scary!  It can be very daunting to change, but change is such a beautiful thing!  I do, and say, some things that my friends and family would never do or say, and then either downplay it, hide it, or suppress it completely.  But at what cost?  That is certainly not honouring my authentic self, and it is time to stop!

I will no longer pander to others’ (or my own limiting) expectations.  I will no longer hide the pieces of me that I think may be judged.  I will honor my true self and desires.  I will stand firm in my beliefs and speak my truth.  And I urge you to do the same.  Forget expectations – just do you!

At the start of the year I wrote a list of 100 things I wanted to do in 2017.  One of them was to learn more about the moon and its cycles.  I have had a fascination with the moon for many many years, even though I didn’t quite understand why.  It was one of those things that I kind of ignored for fear of friends and family thinking I might be a bit weird or ‘woo-woo’ and I simply knew nothing about.  Well, I can confidently say that I have immersed myself in the magic of the moon this year and feel even more connected to it than ever.  The more I learn, the more I fall in love with the magic it offers.

One of the first actions I took to deepen my ‘connection’ with the moon was to create a basic monthly ritual.  Although that has now expanded to include a new moon and full moon ritual most months, this basic ritual can be completed at any time (even though the moons energy will vary throughout its cycle), and is very simple to do using the 6 steps below.  If you have never taken part in any type of ritual I urge you to give it a try, with an open mind, and more importantly an open heart.  Feel into the moment and enjoy.

1.  Give yourself the gift of time.

Make time in your schedule to set aside half an hour with no distractions.

2.  Create our very own sacred space.

Image via Pixabay

This can be as simple or elaborate as you like and can be done indoors or outdoors directly under the moonlight itself.  You can set out a nice rug and cushions to sit on.  You can burn some sage or palo santo to ‘cleanse’ the space of any existing energy.  You can play some beautiful music, set up your favourite crystals and/or light some candles (this can be called an altar).  You really can do whatever feels good to you.

3.  Connect with the divine.

Get comfy.  Slow your breathing down.  Take deep mindful breaths while feeling the love in your heart expand.  You can visualise sending that love through your root chakra into the earth or maybe you would prefer to visualise your crown chakra opening up and the moon light streaming down into your body – I like to do both!

4.  Let your voice be free.

Image via Stocksnap

I love chanting and singing, like seriously LOVE it!  There are some absolutely beautiful and powerful chants and songs you can sing, depending on what you like.  If you don’t know where to start, search YouTube and listen to a few to see what resonates with you.  I personally love mantras that raise my vibration, such as Om Shree Sache, as well as goddess/wiccan chants/songs that really root me to mother earth.  I am loving Moonchant (Spring) at the moment.

5.  Bring your dreams to life.

Image via Stocksnap

Set your intentions, preferably out loud.  What is it that you want in the next 4 weeks?  And more importantly, how will you feel once you have it?  Visualise what it will look like in great details.  Sit with those thoughts and really invest in to how you will feel when they manifest.  Open your heart to the universe and ask for her to guide you.  If you don’t have any specific intentions, simply surrender to mother nature to bring you what it is you need.

6.  Practice gratitude.

I always end my ritual with gratitude by simply placing my hands together and bringing them to my heart.  I give thanks to the universe, to my guides and to the many things in my life that I am so very grateful for.  I always pay gratitude for my intentions manifesting and remember that by simply being grateful, the universe will deliver on the law of attraction providing an abundance of things to be grateful for.

That is it – simple, really!  The joy is that you can completely make it your own.  Follow your intuition and do what feels good to you.  You can also partake in these rituals on your own or with a friend (or group of friends!).  Do you currently engage in moon rituals?  We would love to hear about them below!

I do it.  You do it.  We all do it. We feed ourselves BS stories, yes that stands for bullshit, over and over again.  Why we can’t do something, have something, be someone.  We are a culmination of the stories we tell ourselves!  More often than not, the stories that hold us back simply stem from fear, and we put so much energy into concocting them, and believing them, that it is hard to change them around.  The good news is that you can change your stories beautiful, you really can.

Last year I attended my first women’s circle which you can read about here.  I instantly fell in love with everything about them.  The idea of having a safe space to go to and be vulnerable and heard while connecting with yourself and others is just beautiful!  For months after I dreamt about facilitating a local circle, but kept telling myself I couldn’t for many reasons – all of which were absolute BS!  I told myself all sorts of crazy things, because deep down I was scared that I wasn’t going to be good enough.  I told myself that I couldn’t manifest that dream, if I was busy manifesting others, totally discounting that they would in fact work hand in hand, just as they should.  I told myself that I wasn’t spiritual enough to host a circle, because I didn’t know anything about witches or angels – really!?  I told myself that it would be impossible to find a local venue that was suitable, if I couldn’t host them at my own home, and I knew I wasn’t able to do that.  I even I told myself that I didn’t dress like other people I have seen hosting circles (clearly not many!) so therefore I couldn’t possibly host a circle and attract the people those other facilitators would attract.  Oh, the irony!

I now realise that I don’t want everyone to be attracted to, and resonate with me – but there will be people out there that are drawn to my own unique energy.  In fact, there will be the perfect amount of people that are.  I don’t need to know a damn thing about witches or angels if I am following my heart and simply leading and sharing what I do know from a place of love – each circle is unique with their rituals and practices.  I didn’t need to agonise over how I could make a gathering work at my home, when I know it is just not suitable, because the perfect venue happened to pop up right in front of me, in the most perfect way. You see, in 4 weeks time, I will be facilitating my very own sacred sister circle and I cannot wait!

I stopped telling myself BS and simply allowed myself to feel the fear.  By doing that and giving myself permission to see what I was truly scared of, I was able to work through it.  There was no need to continue feeding myself the stories that were holding me back.  Next time you find you are talking yourself out of something, or telling yourself that you can’t have/do/be someone or something, just stop.  Recognise the fear, and quit the BS.  You’ve got this!

Feature image via Pexels

There is no doubt that meditation can deliver a host of benefits, particularly to those juggling busy lives and various responsibilities.  Improved sleep, mental clarity, a tool for combatting anxiety – the list goes on.  Although it may seem like common sense to put your phone away when seeking those things, you may actually find it useful thanks to the host of meditation apps available!  I have tried a number of apps since I started mediation, looking for the right one/s for me.  I have used some very average (that is being kind) apps that I deleted as quickly as I installed them, and I have used some really great ones too.  Meditation is a very personal practice, so it pays to try a few different sources to discover what feels good to you.  Here are my three favourites!

1.  Headspace

Headspace is undoubtedly one of the most popular wellness apps out there.  They describe their service as a ‘gym membership for your mind’ – and that is a pretty accurate description.  Headspace have a wide and varied range of guided meditations to suit everyone, and you will no doubt keep coming back for more.  They also offer a FREE Take 10 programme to get you started before you need to subscribe.

Length of sessions: 5 to 20 minutes

2.  Buddhify

Buddhify is a great value app offering over 80 custom meditations to guide you through any situation or time of day.  It was named by Buzzfeed as the best meditation app to ease anxiety.  Buddhify is very user friendly and has no hidden subscription costs which is always great!  I would recommend this app to anyone new to meditating and wanting to try it out.

Length of sessions: 3 to 25 minutes

3.  Calm

Calm is renowned for their 7 and 21 day programs on various topics such as gratitude or sleep, though they have plenty more to offer also!  As well as guided sessions, they provide different sound themes to transport you to a different world. Calm also includes ‘sleep stories’ – bed time stories for adults to help you relax and drift off.  Calm offer a number of FREE meditations, including a 7-day program, but by subscribing you unlock a great range of services.

Length of sessions: 3 to 30 minutes

If you have never tried meditating on your own, one of these apps are an amazing place to start.  Have you tried them, or do you use another meditation app? Let us know what you think and what you would recommend to others.  Now, I am off to meditate…

{Editor’s Note: This post is not sponsored by or affiliated with any of the brands or businesses mentioned in this post.}

Not only are crystal grids beautiful to look at, but they can be a powerful tool for harnessing energy to manifest your dreams and intentions.  Abundance, love, sleep, health, creativity – whatever you desire, a crystal grid can help you manifest it.  Although crystals on their own can be very effective, a grid combines and holds the energy of multiple crystals and sacred geometry, charged by your intention.  There are of course no right or wrong ways to create your grid, but there are some great tips for cleansing, creating and ‘charging’ your grid that I would love to share with you.  The most important things are to simply listen to your intuition, act from your heart and be creative.

1.  Set your intention and choose your crystals

What is it that you want to manifest or achieve?  Improved quality of sleep?  Attract love into your life?  Gain clarity or productivity in business?  The clearer your intention, the better.  Your intention is what will charge your crystals, along with their energy.  Write your intention on a small piece of paper and pop aside.  Next, choose the crystals you would like to use.  For love you may like to use rose quartz or green adventurine.  For success, maybe citrine or jade.  You can use a single type of stone or combinations of multiple.  A master crystal should be chosen for the centre of your grid as the primary energy force.  You can find a comprehensive list of crystal meanings and uses here. Of course, again there is no right or wrong.  The best crystals to use will be the ones you are drawn to.

2.  Cleanse your crystals and space

The purpose of cleansing is to clear out any old energy your crystals may be storing.  Cleansing is particularly essential when using for healing purposes.  There are many ways you can do this, including placing them outside under the moon, submerging in cold water (preferably with sea salt, and never hot!), burying in the earth or smudging.  Smudging is the perfect way to cleanse the space in which you will be creating your grid also.  You can do this by burning sage or palo santo to clear the energy around you. I also like to take my time holding each crystal I use, particularly the master crystal, in my hands while repeating my intention and letting my energy flow into it.

3.  Create your grid

The fun part is creating your very own unique grid.  Using your crystals, create a geometric pattern on your chosen surface (avoid plastic and metal) keeping your intention at the forefront of your mind with every crystal you place.  Bear in mind that you will want to set up your grid in a place it will not be disturbed, so a tray or board is a great option.  You can use a purpose made grid cloth, or simply create your own pattern from the heart.  The centre, or master crystal you have chosen should be placed in the middle of your grid last.  I like to use a crystal point or tower as my master where possible.  Place your master crystal in the centre, on top of your written intention.

4.  Activate your grid

Image via Stocksnap

Now that your grid has been created, there are various steps you can take to activate your grid.  I prefer to connect my crystals and then charge my grid.  To connect the crystals, you can use a quartz wand or point, or simply your finger, to draw an invisible line to energetically connect each crystal – a bit like a dot to dot!  To finalise activation, simply relax and hold your hands open, palms down, above your grid and send your energy and intention into it once again.  Visualise your intention already manifested and give gratitude to the universe.

Creating your own grid is not only simple, but very therapeutic and powerful.  Once you start getting creative with your crystals you will never turn back!   Create.  Manifest.  Enjoy, gorgeous.

Feature image via Stocksnap

As we travel through life we accumulate various friends and acquaintances through circumstances.  A few lifelong friends from high school, work colleagues, wives of your husband’s friends, school Mums, friends of friends, team mates from the sport you play, etc.  Sure, most of them are probably nice, kind even, but are they your tribe?  Are they a community that lights you up and ‘gets’ you?  A place where you belong and feel you can be openly authentically YOU?

I am sure you have heard people talking about ‘finding their tribe’.  It’s certainly not a new concept, but it is something we are craving more and more.  In an era where we are more technologically connected than ever, yet so much more physically and emotionally disconnected, we all want to find our tribe, and love them hard.  But, who is your tribe?   And, how will you know when you find them?  They are great questions, and the answer is simply: you will just know!

To me, a tribe is a group of like-minded beautiful souls that empower, encourage and inspire you.  They support you and hold space for you when you just can’t.  They not only accept, but love you for everything you are.  They are relatable – the resonance is mutual.  Authenticity lights them up.  They light you up.

So how do we find them?  Just let your gorgeous self shine beautiful.  Be confident at being you.  Drop the façade, the expectations, the fear.  Just be you and they will come.  And if you can’t wait, or don’t want to, seek them out.  Online communities are a great place to start, particularly if you don’t know where to turn locally.  For example, there are Facebook groups for everything – journaling fanatics, hula hooping, wild women, bloggers, artists, heart centred entrepreneurs, animal lovers etc.  Find a group that makes your heart sing and introduce yourself.  You already know you have something in common with the people in these groups, and who knows what will come next!

Put out the vibe you want to attract.  Be open to what may come.  Be genuine and speak your truth.  Find your tribe, and love them hard.

Feature image via royalty-free stock photo

Dew kissed sunrises, beautiful sunny days, cool afternoons, glorious golden sunsets and clear night skies dancing with twinkling stars.  No TV.  No computers.  No world news.  No social media.  A life detox if you will!  Bliss… This Easter long weekend called for a camping getaway and it was perfect.  Sure, there were a few annoying mosquitos at dusk, an overtired 3-year-old on occasions, and cows mooing outside our camper at 2am one morning, but still, bliss…  There is a lot to be said about camping, and if you haven’t done it a while (or ever!), you should plan your next trip now.

It’s super affordable

Credit: Stocksnap

As far as getaways go, once you have your equipment, camping would have to be one of the cheapest options available to families.  Fuel for your vehicle, an esky full of food and depending on where you camp, maybe a site fee.  Do some research or ask around, to find the perfect budget friendly spot to suit you and your family.  From popular parks to remote woods, there is an option for everyone!

Enjoy mother nature’s gifts

Credit: Stocksnap

My favourite thing about camping is undoubtedly disconnecting from the hustle and bustle of modern day life, and submersing myself in all of mother nature’s glory.  The flora, fauna, earth and fresh air are all glorious gifts that we so often overlook in our everyday lives.  When there is no clock to watch or appointment to be at next, time almost slows down and you can truly appreciate the things around you that are so often ignored or taken for granted.  Be present in the moment and appreciate the sun rising and falling whilst listening to the birds chirping around you.  You can take your time swimming in mother nature’s creeks/oceans/lakes and actually take note how the cool water feels as it embraces your body.  Even if it rains, stop and smell the beautiful fresh dewy air, and feel the earth under your feet – it really is magic!

Play!

Credit: Stocksnap

Sit down on the grass, or in the sand, and play with your children.  Play with your partner, your friends and family.  Go for a hike.  Swim.  Ride.  Pull out the board games or a deck of cards. Play eye spy, hopscotch, or chasey.  Make something creative using bits and bobs you find in nature. Grab a torch and go exploring after dark.  Whatever you do, do it mindfully – let your imagination run wild and enjoy it!

Take time out

Credit: Stocksnap

Whether alone, with your family or a group of friends, take time out.  Time for you to just be.  Let your surroundings recharge your body and soul.  Read a book you have been thinking about, journal about what is really important to you, listen to a guided meditation or simply sleep/rest and be still out in the open – hammocks are the best for this!  As always, it is so beneficial for your own wellbeing to make time for you.

Whether you go for a weekend or a week, enjoy every moment.  Going back to basics and camping in the outdoors really allows you stop, be grounded, and appreciate all you have.  Go on, disconnect from day to day life in order to reconnect with yourself and your loved ones.

Feature image via Stocksnap

Why can’t I just be content with going to work and being a Mum?

In amongst tears on a Skype call with a friend, this is what I found myself asking her last night.  The truth is, I have had a pretty so-so week.  Not a super down, depressed, everything going wrong week, not at all.  But a so-so week.  I have been a little overwhelmed with my commitments, but mostly feeling disconnected and just a bit lost amongst my priorities.  Self-doubt has been visiting and she most definitely overstayed her welcome. I have had a few extra things on my mind of late, a bit of an increased work load, and feel like my three-year-old has needed a little more time and compassion due to a change in his routine and family visiting.  When you start adding extra things to an already (usually blissful) full plate, you can let little, but hugely important things fall to the way side.  Things like ‘me time’ and self-care for example.  When you aren’t taking that time to replenish your own body, heart and soul, overwhelm can quickly set in.

Ultimately, I haven’t been practising what I preach: what I believe in and stand for.

And I am not really okay with that…

I knew this was coming.  I could feel the overwhelm and unease within myself building. I could feel myself disconnecting more and more as the week rolled on.  With myself, my friends, my inspirations and my beautiful followers on social media.  I know within myself, that these feelings typically occur when I am not living in alignment with my values, when I am not living in alignment with the woman I want to be. Self-care is very important to me, as it should be to every woman.  Components including nutrition, movement, connection, spiritual practice and stillness,
all come into play here.  Because I am such a huge advocate for self-care and wellness, when I am not implementing the things I often recommend and in fact of course NEED myself, I basically feel like a fraud, for lack of better word.  When I am not putting self-care first, my energy wanes.

I should have been spending time over the last week on my personal and business development.  I had it scheduled in!  But the more I pushed and pushed and pushed, the more I resisted and withdrew.  The few things I did do, were half arsed and not heart-centered.  They were coming from a place of force, not love.  I should have recognised that I needed to stop and breathe and reset, but I didn’t.  Nothing huge or significant had taken place, so why was I feeling so rattled in my life? I started to beat myself up for not doing what I ‘should’ have done, when I ‘should’ have done it, and then started to think, why bother at all?  I couldn’t empower other women, when I wasn’t
feeling empowered.  I couldn’t share my love and support with others, when I wasn’t giving it to myself. I couldn’t give out beautiful inspiration or energy, because I had none to give.

What I have described my friends, is an energy shift.  Before we can soar to something great or beautiful, we tend to experience nothing less than chaos and confusion.  In order to see that and allow ourselves to up level or transform, we must listen to our bodies and hearts, and simply surrender.  Instead of seeing that, and being kind and gentle to myself, I just kept pushing.  My soul (and body!) was looking for space.  Space to rest, renew, recalibrate.  Instead of surrendering to that, I withdrew and stripped myself from the very things that could have seen me support and nurture my way through this shift – connection and self-care!

Last night I really dug deep after the skype call with my friend and just sat with myself and my thoughts.  I gave myself permission to just let things be.  To surrender.  To be kind to myself, regardless of whether I was doing all the other things I ‘should’ have been doing.  And then, ahhhhhh, relief!  I answered my own question, with a smile on my face, instead of a lump in my throat like the night before.  Why can’t I just be content with going to work and being a Mum?  Because I have so much more to give, that in turn lights me up!  I can be a great employee and Mum, and a great wife, mentor, friend, coach, entrepreneur and inspiration.  Some weeks I just may not be able to do them all at once or with as much passion and commitment as other weeks.  And that is okay!

Now, I don’t know what this recent energy shift means for me yet, but I do know that it’s going to be beautiful and great, and I’m going to soar!  And I know you’re nodding.  You’ve been here at some stage too…  Surrender. Be kind and gentle with yourself. Do not compromise on self-care or resist connection.  Hang in there and ride out that energy shift so you can soar too beautiful!

Feature image via Stocksnap