In the aftermath of having a child, much of what happens next is a blur. There are nurse visits, sleepless nights, and a whole load of crying — both from you and your newborn. As time goes by, the days merge into one long, restless period. It’s hard to know which way is up, let alone deal with anyone but your baby.

It’s during this time, too, when people will start dishing out their unsolicited advice. You’ll soon learn that just about everyone out there in the big, wide world has an opinion on how you should look after and raise your child. Needless to say, one of the rhetorics that will be repeated time and time again is this: You absolutely must breastfeed.  

A massive 81% of moms will breastfeed at some point, but as little as 22% will exclusively feed their child via breastfeeding for the first six months, according to CDC data.

Now, many publications have reported these stats in absolute horror. The undertone being that it’s every mother’s duty to breastfeed regardless of how they happen to feel about it.

And yet, while there’s no doubt that breastfeeding helps a newborn’s nutrition and health, recent research from Ohio State University found that the benefits of it could well be overstated.

The study’s authors went on to say that we should be ‘more realistic about what breastfeeding does and doesn’t do.’

So, why is it so many feel the need to push women into this method of feeding?

The shame factor in not breastfeeding

There’s a growing culture of shaming both inside and outside the new moms’ club, which is potentially damaging. You only have to type ‘breastfeeding’ into a Google search, and you get ream after ream of ranty blogs telling moms how this is essential to their child’s well-being.

Forums too are filled with advice from other mothers claiming the many benefits of breastfeeding make it crucial. The pressure is real. Of course, there are also helpful guides on how to breastfeed and useful sites with info about the potential benefits of this choice.

But ‘choice’ is the operative word here. Breastfeeding is and always should be seen as a choice for mothers, not the only way to go. There are many reasons that a woman may choose to breastfeed her child. But, equally, there are reasons that some women don’t want to go ahead with this activity. And, yes, they are perfectly valid.

Reasons women may not breastfeed:

Here’s something that we all need to accept: Breastfeeding is not for everyone.

It works for some people (and that’s awesome!) but not for others. With that in mind, here are some of the reasons that some women don’t wish to do it:

1.  They are unable to initiate feeding.

Make no mistakes, not every baby out there will take to breastfeeding. This problem can be all too harrowing for new mothers, especially since they’ve been lead to believe that breastfeeding is the only option.

Often enough, a child will not start feeding no matter how much you hold them in the right position or show them where they should be. After seeking expert help and explaining the problem, you may conclude that this is not for your baby, and have to look at other options.

2.  Their lifestyle doesn’t allow them to.

Mothers are busy people too. If your career or lifestyle means that you can’t breastfeed several times a day, that is not a problem. Pumping milk or even using a mixture of milk and formula could be the way forward for you.

There are, in fact, many ways to ensure that your child gets the nutrients it needs. What’s more, every case is different, which means that every mom gets to decide what works for her.  

3.  They are on medication or ill.

As you may already know, when you’re on medication or have certain illnesses, you simply cannot breastfeed your child. Doing so could be potentially dangerous for them and so is not advised. The seriously troubling thing about the way many shame those who don’t breastfeed is that they often don’t understand the situation.

4.  They just don’t want to do it.

Finally, perhaps the hardest reason for people to understand, is this: Some women don’t want to breastfeed. Every woman has full jurisdiction over her body. What she says should always go. Period. So, if you or any other woman chooses not to breastfeed out of choice, that is entirely up to her.

The takeaway here is not by any means that you should or shouldn’t breastfeed. Both of these options are valid. Instead, it’s that you (and actually every mother out there) have a choice. It’s yours… and yours alone. 

Are you wearing the right bra size? Most of us just assume that we are. We get measured once (or even, worse, just guess!) and then buy the same size for years on end. If that sounds about right, it may surprise you to learn that a whopping 80% of women wear the wrong bra size. So, the chances of you having an ill-fitting bra are extremely high.

So, where should you start? Well, the best way forward is to get fitted by a professional. Once you’ve been measured, you can be sure that the size is right for you. In the meantime, look out for any of these telltale signs.

1.  You get strap marks after a long day.

After a long, hard day, you get home, you slip off your bra in relief. But what’s the notice in the mirror? If you have strap marks, the chances are that your straps have been digging into your skin throughout the day. These pieces of materials should sit comfortably on your shoulders and, importantly, offer you the support you need. If they are not doing that, something is most certainly wrong.

2.  The band sits too high on your back.

Many women are unsure of where the bra band should sit on their back. If you find that this strip of material is riding high up your back, it could be that you’re wearing the wrong size. The band should sit horizontally on your back and not dig into your skin. It should also be flat and straight at all times.

3.  There’s no space beneath the band.

While we’re on the subject of the band, you need to make sure that you have some space beneath it. You should, in theory, be able to slip two fingers underneath it with no problems at all. Make sure that you try this when you’re wearing your bra. If you can’t do so, it could well be that the bra is too tight for you. Yikes!

4.  You have a gap inside the cups.

One of the easiest ways to see that you’re wearing the wrong cup size is simply to look. If there is a gap between your breasts and the material, you’re likely wearing a cup size that’s too large for you. If the tops of your breasts are ‘spilling’ over the cup, it’s likely that the size is too small. Your breasts should sit comfortably inside the cup without any gaps.

5.  You wear it on the tightest hook.

When you put your bra on, which hook do you use? If you’re always used to hooking it on the tightest one possible, you may want to consider changing bra sizes. For the most part, women only need to use the middle hook on their bra clasp. This one should offer both the right level of comfort and support. Simple.

Related: 6 Signs It’s Time To Buy New Bras

6.  You have an ‘underboob’ situation.

Take a look in the mirror and lift your arms up. If you get some underboob popping out of the bottom of the cups, that could well be a sign that the bra itself is too large. Your bra should rise with your breasts rather than them essentially ‘popping out’ every now and then. It’s that easy to remember.

7.  The underwire hurts your sides.

The underwire or ‘bone’ of the bra should never cause you any pain or irritation. That right there is the golden rule! If you find that the wiring is digging into your sides or breasts, it means that the size of the bra is off. The last thing you need to do is walk around all day long in pain because of your bra. It’s not healthy! Instead, make sure that you’re wearing one that truly fits.

8.  You’re conscious of wearing a bra.

Are you aware of your bra as you go about your day-to-day business? When you’re wearing the correct size, it shouldn’t both you throughout the day. You might even forget that you’re wearing it, for example. So, if all you can think about is the fact that you have a bra on, something is wrong. It’s worth getting fitted, if just for peace of mind.

9.  You’re always trying to adjust it.

When something is not the right fit, we will do everything we can to try to make it work. With that in mind, if you’re constantly adjusting your bra to try and get it to fit you, that means that you need a new one. After all, you shouldn’t have to make continuous changes to the garment all the time.

10.  You feel seriously uncomfortable.

Finally, perhaps the biggest telltale sign that a bra is wrong for you is this: it feels wrong. It may sound overly simplistic, but it’s the truth. Your bra should never make you feel uncomfortable. So, if it does, it’s time to do something about it. The sooner you find the right size for you, the better!

Related: Is Your Bra Too Small?

We Highly Recommend

Whether you’re shopping for new everyday bras or lingerie for a special occasion, it’s always a good idea to seek out a second opinion. We know how hard it is to find bras that fit well and feel good, especially when you’re doing it on your own. If you’ve ever felt unsure about your bra size or you just don’t know where to go to find good bras, it’s time to let a bra fitter help.

Many specialty lingerie boutiques offer bra fittings. Their expert bra fitters will take the pain and frustration out of bra shopping and do all the work for you. Even better, their product knowledge can save you time and money. Plus, they know where all of the best bras are hiding.

If you’ve struggled with finding bras in the right size, it’s time to make a change. Visit our specialty store locator to find a store near you and schedule an appointment.

Happy bra shopping!

Featured image lingerie:

Parfait Tess Unlined Wire Bra P5022 in Charcoal

Let’s talk about #BoPo

Long gone are the days when exclusively slim models adorn advertising campaigns. Thanks to the Body Positive (#BoPo) Movement along with social advancements, we’re now seeing more and more ‘realistic’ body sizes in the media.

But wait just a minute, what effect is this change having on us ladies and, crucially, our minds?

Well, according to a new study by Florida State University, seeing plus-size models in the media helped to enhance women’s psychological health.

That’s right; looking at healthier, fuller sized women rather than the stereotypical model body shape could have more benefits than we ever imagined before now.

“By measuring psychophysiological responses during image exposure, we were able to gain insights into the real-time cognitive and emotional responses that unfold when women are exposed to different-size media fashion models,” explained Russell Clayton, assistant professor in the FSU School of Communication, director of the Cognition and Emotion Lab and lead author of the study.

As part of the study, Clayton, Jessica Ridgway, assistant professor in the Department of Retail, Merchandising and Product Development, and Joshua Hendrickse, a doctoral student in the FSU School of Communication worked with college-age women to determine their responses to various media forms.

The 49 participants in the study had all previously indicated that they wanted to be slimmer than they were. As part of the study, each of the women was shown imagery of thin, average, and plus-size models.

Whilst this was happening, the researchers took note of the participants’ psychophysiological responses, so that they could determine how each image impacted them.

The results were highly telling of the way we respond to the images that we see within the media. When the participants saw average or plus-size models, they paid more attention to the adverts in general and also came away with higher levels of body satisfaction.

In essence, that means that seeing these women portrayed in the media actually improved their levels of wellbeing and mental health.

“We found overwhelmingly that there is a clear psychological advantage when the media shows more realistic body types than the traditional thin model,” Ridgway later explained.

Of course, on the flip side, seeing the ultra thin models had quite the opposite effect. The researchers noted that when women saw these images, they were more likely to make comparisons between themselves and the models and also paid less attention to the adverts. Even more worryingly, these images meant that participants had less body satisfaction, which has been proven to have negative impacts on mental health.

“Women made fewer social comparisons, felt increased body satisfaction, paid more attention to and remembered average and plus-size models. Therefore, it might be a useful persuasive strategy for media producers to employ plus-size models if the goal of the campaign is to capture attention while also promoting body positivity,” said Clayton.

The takeaway is simple — seeing larger women in the media not only helps boost women’s mental health and the way they see themselves, but it is also more effective than other forms of advertising. What could possibly be better than that?

There’s no doubt about it; over the last few years the #BoPo movement has grown and grown. So, with the standards of beauty in advertising changing, it will be intriguing to see what happens next. Watch this space!

Related: 7 Ways To Show Your Body The Love It Deserves

Do you feel represented in the media? What could brands do better?

We all know that exercise can help us flourish in every area of our lives. From boosting our fitness levels to improving our well-being, there’s no end to the benefits of getting out there and getting active. Before you do so, though, you really need to make sure that you get the right gym wear for your body type.  

Whether you’re a complete gym bunny or just dabble in a little yoga here and there, getting the right fitting bra for yourself is extremely important. But where on earth should you start? In truth, this is something that all too many ladies overlook, and yet doing so is a mistake.

Here’s what you absolutely need to know: Choosing the right bra is crucial!

You may wonder why choosing the right sports bra is so very important. Well, not only will this help you when you workout, but there are a number of reasons that you need to make sure that you’re wearing the right one for you. When you exercise, you contort yourself into loads of different positions and move around a whole load. That puts a lot of excess pressure on your body, particularly the breast area.

If you lack the right support, you could find that you experience, discomfort, back pain, and even premature sagging! If you want to avoid all of the above, here’s what you need to do:

Take the time to get fitted

Before you can get fit in the gym, you need to make sure that you get your bra fitted! (See what we did there?) Surprisingly enough, according to a recent study, more than 70% of women in the UK wear the wrong bra size.

That means that the chances are, you could be wearing a size that is completely wrong for your shape and size. Yikes!

While you may not notice this issue on a day to day basis, when it comes to doing sports and wearing a sports bra, it will make a dramatic impact on how you look and feel.

If you’re not 100% sure what your size is right now, it’s well worth taking the time to get fitted.

Most women don’t realize this, but you should get a bra fitting every 6-8 months. After all, the size of your breasts may well change over time, and so you need the most accurate reading at any given point. Since sports bras are all about support, this tip really is essential to that.

Opt for thicker straps

Since getting a good sports bra is all about support, you need to make sure that the straps are a good fit.

Don’t be afraid of thick or wide straps – the thicker the straps, the more comfortable the bra will be when you’re wearing it. This is especially important if you wear a D cup or larger. What’s more, thicker straps are less likely it is to dig into your shoulders or back if you pick the right style for your body type. It may be worth taking the time to try on a few different styles of sports bras so you can get the right fit.

Once you’ve chosen a bra that feels and looks right, it’s time to adjust the straps to suit your body shape. The cardinal rule here is that the straps should sit flat against your skin without making any marks on it. You should be able to slip two fingers beneath the strap but it should still be tight enough to offer you the level of support you need.

Pro Tip:

If you have strap marks when you take off your bra, you’re likely wearing the wrong size. In reality, your straps should never dig into you or cause you irritation!

Related: What’s The Difference Between Low, Medium, and High Impact Sports Bras?

Check the fit of the underband

The majority of your support, though, won’t come from your straps at all. Instead, it will be provided by the underband (i.e. the strip of material at the bottom of the bra itself). When buying yourself a sports bra, you should pay close attention to this area — it can really make all of the difference.

The key here is that the band should lie straight across from front (just below your breasts) to back. Again, the thicker and stronger this band is, the better. The point is that the underband should fill snug without feeling uncomfortable.

Get the cup size right

Finally, let’s talk for a moment about your cup size. There should be no spillage whatsoever over the edge of the cup when you first try the sports bra on. That is something that you definitely need to keep in mind.

Ensuring that you buy a bra with a specific cup size is important too. Opting for a generic size (S,M,L,XL) not only means that you may not get the right fit for your breasts, it also means that you will get the thick straps that you need too. If you’re a larger breasted lady, especially, you may run into no end of problems here! So just be sure that the fit is right for you before you go any further.

Your breasts should be completely covered by the cup itself and, crucially, the material needs to be tight enough that it holds them in place no matter how much you move. (Because, let’s face it, you’re going to be moving a whole lot when you work out!) It’s worth trying a few different bras before you find the one for you.

Oh, and remember, you should be sure to replace your sports bra at least once every three months or so. That way, you will know that you always have the very best level of support!

Related: How To Wash Sports Bras

We Highly Recommend

Whether you’re shopping for new everyday bras or lingerie for a special occasion, it’s always a good idea to seek out a second opinion. We know how hard it is to find bras that fit well and feel good, especially when you’re doing it on your own. If you’ve ever felt unsure about your bra size or you just don’t know where to go to find good bras, it’s time to let a bra fitter help.

Many specialty lingerie boutiques offer bra fittings. Their expert bra fitters will take the pain and frustration out of bra shopping and do all the work for you. Even better, their product knowledge can save you time and money. Plus, they know where all of the best bras are hiding.

If you’ve struggled with finding bras in the right size, it’s time to make a change. Visit our specialty store locator to find a store near you and schedule an appointment.

Happy bra shopping!

Featured image:

Parfait Active Sports Bra P5541 in Black

There are few feelings comparable to that of a day spent working hard and, crucially, effectively. When you finally get home, kick off your shoes and sink deep into the sofa, you know that you’ve truly earned this rest. This is your time; job done.

If those super productive days feel ever more elusive, though, something has to change. You may not realize it but you can make yourself more productive by simply changing the way you approach work. In fact, here are ten ridiculously simple tasks that will help you do just that. Why not go ahead and try them for yourself?

1.  Choose your colours wisely

You may not think that the colors you use in your work have all that much to do with your productivity levels, but what if you’re wrong? Actually, according to a study by University of British Columbia, there are certain shades out there that could help to unleash your creativity and even make you work harder. It might sound like a leap, but according to the research, just changing the colours you tend to use could make all the difference.

So, what colors should you be using? Well, if you’re lacking focus, grabbing a red pen could be the way forward; the color has been shown to help people enhance their attention to detail. What’s more, if you use blue, it helps you to think more creativity. These two powers combined are sure to boost your productivity levels in a dramatic way.

2.  Exercise at work

We all know that we ought to get more exercise on a regular basis. Still, what with our busy schedules, social lives, and work commitments, who has the time? Though it may well sound a little odd, spending some time working out while you’re in the office could help you to get more done.

Yes, a study published in the Journal of Occupational and Environmental Medicine found that by devoting just a little of your working day to doing some physical exercise, you can become more productive in an instant. With that in mind, why not try a quick cardio burst in your lunch hour?

3.  Learn how to timetable

How would you rate your timetabling skills? Do you just note everything down in your diary and hope for the best? Or, on the other hand, do you pencil in time slots for each of your daily chores? Well, if you’re hoping to get more done, it’s the latter that you should be doing when it comes to planning your day out.

In truth, having a vague ‘to do’ list is not the most effective way to go about scheduling things. Instead, if you give yourself realistic timescales for each of your chores, you should find that you have more motivation to get them done. So, if you think replying emails will take you 30 minutes, schedule between 9.00am and 9.30am to get it all done. That should keep you on track.

4.  Hide your phone away

The biggest hinderance in the modern working world fits neatly into the palm of your hand. While you may not think that your smartphone is so much of a problem, the chances are that it distracts you each and every day. Warning: If you have nomophobia, i.e. the fear of being away from your phone, this could be seriously hard.

Think about it — every time you check your smartphone or, indeed, social media, you’re wasting precious seconds, minutes, and hours of your working day. While, of course, quitting altogether could be hard, try instead to limit the amount of time you spend on your phone. Put it in your bag and only check it during break times.

5.  Reward yourself now and then

You should never underestimate the power of positive reinforcement. If you’ve got some pesky tasks that you’ve been putting off for quite some time, you may find that this next hack helps you greatly. Give yourself a reward. It really is that simple. Tell yourself, ‘After I’ve completed these annoying tasks, I can have a coffee/chocolate/break.’ That way, you know that after the boring chores are over, you will have something to look forward to.

6.  Empower yourself and say ‘no’

Working in a busy office can sometimes be distracting, not least if you happen to be something of a ‘yes’ woman. When people ask you for small work-related favors, do you find yourself saying yes, yes, yes every single time? Remember, there’s very little thanks in being a people-pleaser so it’s not worth wasting your time here.

The next time someone asks you to do something consider a) if you you need to do it and b) if you have the time to do it. If the answer to both of those questions is no, then you know what you have to say. Sometimes, refusing to do unnecessary tasks can feel utterly empowering.

7.  Batch small tasks together

If you haven’t heard of the ‘batching’ technique, you’re in for a real treat. We all have those little tasks that sink to the bottom of our lists each day. Whether it’s replying to emails, updating your LinkedIn profile, or just keeping your accounts in check, it’s easy to ignore these small things. That’s where the technique comes in.

So, here’s what you need to do: First of all, make a list of all the small tasks you’ve been avoiding. Next, set a timer for 25 minutes and get started. Dedicating just a small amount of time to these tasks could be just what you need to pull them off and get them out of the way. That way, they don’t just sit on your list — they get done!

8.  Unsubscribe to newsletters

Most of us live and die by our daily emails. Whether it’s messages from clients or even our bosses, you need to stay on top of these. What you don’t need to do, though, is get uber distracted by them. If you have extra emails (such as promo deals and the like) coming through all day, you’re hardly going to get anything done at all.

Unsubscribing from these marketing messages is just what you need to do. On the bottom of each email, you will find that there is a (usually well-hidden) ‘unsubscribe’ button. Go ahead and click it. You don’t realize what a massive difference it will make to your working life.

9.  Do your hardest tasks first

For many of us, the morning is the time when we ease into work. We check our emails, make a coffee, and get things started at a slow and steady pace. Well, what if you tried something different? Starting the day by diving headfirst into your most difficult task may sound like a recipe for disaster, but it could help you get more done. Once you’re over the hump of the first task, everything will be smoother and easier.

10.  Focus on your own happiness

You might think that the words ‘happiness’ and ‘work’ need never be used in the same sentence. However, you could be wrong. According to a study by the University of Warwick, people actually work harder when they feel happy. So, if you want to make each workday better, working on yourself could be the way forward.

One of the easiest ways in which you can boost your happiness levels if to treat yourself now and then. Whether it’s relaxing with a book (just because) or going ahead and having that extra cookie, these small things could make all the difference. Go on — be good to yourself!

From the very moment you hold your newborn child in your arms, your entire world changes. Life as you once knew it is a thing of the past. Now, you’ve entered a whole new chapter of your life; you’ve become a mother.

In truth, few women realize just how deep this transformation runs. In the lead up to you giving birth, people will tell you about the changes, but you’re unlikely to believe them. It’s not until you actually take that step; until you’re responsible for the most precious thing in the world, that it really dawns on you. This is it — how it was always meant to be. Here’s how motherhood changes every single part of your life.

1.  It makes you believe in love at first sight.

There’s no doubt about it, when you look into the eyes of your child for the first time, you will feel pangs of love deep down inside. It’s unlike anything you will have experienced before now. A sense of caring, loving, and protection will rush over you all at once. Right away, you will be certain that this is your purpose. You are here to nurture and support this little being, no matter what the future holds for the two of you.

2.  You bond in a new way with your partner.

Just as you’ve become a new version of yourself, so will your partner. You will notice it soon after you become parents. The way that they interact and communicate with you will change. Nothing is uncertain anymore; you’ve now got an unspoken bond that is stronger than anything you had before. You’ve created a new life.

There’s nothing more attractive than seeing the father of your child looking after them. When you start to see them in this new light, it will completely revitalise your relationship with them. From now, it’s you against the rest of the world.

3.  You start to worry about your child 24/7.

One of the most unexpected side effects of motherhood is worry. All of a sudden, this great, ginormous responsibility is thrust upon you and you need to deal with it. You may worry that your baby will get hurt or that they are ill in some way. These concerns are completely natural. In fact, according to a study from Northwestern University, found that new mothers are more likely to show obsessive-compulsive symptoms than the rest of society.

The reason is simple — your primary goal is to keep your baby safe and, of course, happy. It’s no wonder that so many moms become obsessed with keeping their child out of harm’s way. Luckily, these symptoms lessen over time as you relax into your new role as a parent.

4.  But you’re better equipped to deal with stress.

While, sure, you might worry more about your child, you are able to deal with the stress much better on the whole. In fact, a study from the Society For Neuroscience, found that motherhood leads to lower levels of the stress hormone. That means that no matter what your baby throws at you — both literally and figuratively — you will be ready for it.

The likelihood is that your strength and resilience will really surprise you when you become a mother. It comes from nowhere, and suddenly, you feel as though you really can conquer anything that gets in the way. That’s the sheer power of being a parent.

5.  Your threshold for grossness changes.

Whether it’s changing your baby’s diapers or cleaning up their sick, being a mother can be icky at the best of times. Somehow, though, when it’s your own child, it no longer matters that these things are disgusting. When it’s your baby, you feel as though none of the above grosses you out. You just take a deep breath, get yourself mentally ready, and get on with it. It might not be pretty, but it’s all part of the job!

6.  You become way more protective.

While you may not have thought of yourself as being protective before now, things are about to change in a serious way. Having children means that a new part of you unlocks. Say hello to your inner lioness — ready to fight off any dangers at a moment’s notice. Hear her roar.

Many people wonder how exactly this change happens so you might be interested to know that your brain really does change during pregnancy. Just last year, research from Universitat Autònoma de Barcelona found that pregnant women experience a ‘long-lasting alterations’ in the brain. The team suggested that the reason for this could be to help mothers protect and interact with their child. Interesting!

7.  Your priorities change dramatically.

Finally, here’s a major lifestyle transformation that you will notice in an instant. Before you were a mother, you likely had a whole load of things on your plate. You had to juggle your social, work, and love life all at once. Well, now, there’s a brand new priority on the scene and it’s gone straight to the top of your list.

Just ask any mother out there and she will say the same thing. The biggest way that motherhood changes you is that your baby becomes your number one in every sense of the phrase. You put them before everything and everyone. Because, in the end, isn’t that how it’s supposed to be?

If you’re on the hunt for a new job, you’ve probably heard every trick, hack, and tip in the book.

Yes, there’s no end of people telling you just how you ought to land your dream job. From oozing faux confidence to wearing just the right outfit, there are many ways people think you can win over a potential employer.

One of the biggest pieces of advice you may have heard is to just say ‘yes’ to whatever you’re asked; say you can do everything and figure out how later. But is putting your best foot forward, so to speak, really the way to go? According to a new study published in the Journal of Applied Psychology, simply being yourself and presenting that in a sincere and honest way could be the secret to getting your next big role.

“People are often encouraged to only present the best aspects of themselves at interview so they appear more attractive to employers, but what we’ve found is that high-quality candidates — the top 10% — fare much better when they present who they really are,” explained the study’s co-author Dr SunYoung Lee. “Unfortunately, the same isn’t true for poorer quality candidates who can actually damage their chances of being offered the job by being more authentic.”

The study looked at two samples of people — teachers and lawyers — when they were applying for new roles. In each case, the participants who ‘self-verified’ (i.e. the ones who were honest about their skills and abilities) were more likely to land the job. The researchers noted that those who had this habit found it easier to communicate with interviewers, and so came across as more authentic.

“In a job interview, we often try to present ourselves as perfect. Our study proves this instinct wrong,” explained the study’s Lead author, Dr Celia Moore. “Interviewers perceive an overly polished self-representation as inauthentic and potentially misrepresentative. But ultimately, if you are a high-quality candidate, you can be yourself on the job market. You can be honest and authentic. And if you are, you will be more likely to get a job.”

So, while your impulse may be to bend the truth a little and tell the interviewer just how ‘perfect’ you are, it could be utterly counterproductive. You’re not fooling anyone. Trying to be someone you’re not will shine through brighter than you can imagine and before you know it, the interviewer will see through you. So, how can you be yourself and present yourself well when you bag your next interview?

How to Relax and Be Yourself In Your Next Interview

If you’ve got an interview in the pipeline, you absolutely need to make sure that you’re ready to go! It’s all very well just saying ‘be yourself’ but how does that really work? For some, it may come naturally but others really need to work hard to make sure that they are as authentic as can be. Here are some tips that will help you along the way:

1.  Write down a list of your skills

First of all, you need to get your head straight when it comes to the skills that you already have. Understanding your talents will mean that you can talk honestly about them when you’re asked to describe yourself. Make a list of all the things that you know you’re good at or that you’ve learned in the workplace.

Now comes the tricky part! Under each skill, write down an example of how and when you last used it. Doing so will mean that you have tangible facts behind every claim you make. So, when an interviewer asks you to expand on a certain skill, you will be ready to do it at a moment’s notice.

2.  Practice answering tricky questions

There’s no doubt about it — the interviewer will likely ask you questions that you’re not prepared for. That’s normal. There’s no possible way that you can guess what they’re going to want to know, and so you just can’t prepare for everything. What you can do, though, is make sure that you’re ready for the unanswerable questions.

Practice what you’re going to say when you don’t have the answer. Your speech should be earnest. By saying that you don’t know or understand something but would like to know more, you’re not misleading the interviewer. Instead, you’re showing that you’re a truthful person who has a willingness to learn; two skills that are invaluable.

3.  Relieve your stress before the interview

Much of the time, the reason people are grandiose about themselves is because they are trying to cover up some nerves! If that’s the case, it may help you no end to de-stress before you head to the interview in the first place! You could try a few techniques to help you along the way. From meditation to getting a decent night’s sleep beforehand, there are many ways you can calm yourself. And…. breathe!

So, the next time you head off for an interview, be sure to take the above advice. Simply finding your calm before an interview and being as authentic as possible won’t guarantee you a job, but it is sure to boost your chances. And now, what about you? If you have any tips or advice on how to chill out before an interview, please leave us a comment below! We’d love to hear your thoughts!

Featured image via royalty-free stock photo

Social media is such a fundamental piece of our lives right now. We use it for everything from organizing events to catching up with old school friends. So, why shouldn’t we use it to meet new people too? Rather surprisingly, 44% of Brits say that they met one of their best friends on social media, according to recent research commissioned by Diet Coke.

“The rise of social media means that we can communicate with our friends easily and it is also a great tool for meeting new people,” explains Natalie Whitehead-Farr, Senior Brand Manager for Coca-Cola Great Britain. And, with more and more people connecting online, there’s never been a better time to reach out.

How to connect safely with people online

If you do plan to find some new besties online, though, there are some things that you ought to know. Ensuring that you are always safe and secure should be your top priority. Here are just seven little tips that you might want to keep in mind.

1.  Join online communities

Of course, you can make connections through the online friends you already have, but why not take things one step further? If you’re looking for people who share your interests, you might want to join an online community. Social media sites, such as Facebook, have group functions that allow you to be a part of a load of people with something in common.

When you join a group (or online forum!), you can be certain that you will engage with people who share your interests. That means that you will have something to chat about first off the bat, and so things will not be awkward or uncomfortable.

2.  Try a social app

Every year, thousands of singles meet ‘the one’ via a dating app; it’s increasingly the most popular way to find a partner. Why should making friends be any different?

There are actually so-called social apps you can use, such as Huggle, which can help you connect with potential friends in your area. These apps work in a similar way to dating apps, meaning you can flick through matches and find people who live nearby and may have similar interests or even personalities. Genius.

3.  Be sincere and ‘real’

Of course, one of the major temptations when engaging with people online is to present yourself as someone you’re just not. We’re talking about making real connections here, though, and to do that you really need to be yourself.

There’s no sense trying to trick someone into liking you online by acting differently to how you would in real life. Should you meet them in the future, they will be in for a real shock when you’re not the same person you appeared to be online. Be genuine.

4.  Watch out for catfish

Catfishing, i.e. someone pretending to be another person, is a massive problem in the online world. When you’re talking to someone new online, you absolutely have to keep this in mind at all times.

There are, of course, certain ways to spot a catfish. If someone is shady about their life, has ‘model like’ photos, and never speaks via the phone or on Skype, these are some major warning signs. Remember, not everything (or, indeed, everyone) is what it seems in the online world.

5.  Never give away personal details

While we’re on the topic of online trickery, here’s one rule that you absolutely always have to stick to. Remember, no one should ever ask you for your personal details online. That includes everything from your banking details to where you live. You don’t need to share this information with anyone and doing so could be a real mistake.

If someone you don’t know IRL asks for these things online, don’t hand them over. Remember, this person could be anyone and you really have no idea what their intentions are. The safest thing you can do is avoid sharing any sensitive information with people online.

6.  Don’t move too fast!

The last thing you want to do online is move too fast. Sure, meeting people in the digital sphere is getting more and more common, but that doesn’t mean that you need to rush ahead of yourself. Building a friendship online will doubtless take longer than it does when you meet someone in the real world.

That means that rather than messaging your new bestie all day, every day, you should take a step back and keep things chilled. One of two things will happen when you do so; either things will fizzle out or you will build a meaningful connection with someone. In each of these scenarios, you’ve lost nothing by trying.

7.  Never meet alone

Finally, here’s a major rule that you absolutely have to keep in mind. If you do take the leap to meet someone face-to-face, you should never do so alone. Be sure to choose a public place in which to meet, take a friend along with you, and let others know where you are. Now, this may seem over-cautious but your safety has to come first in this situation.

So, would you be willing to meet a new friend online or does the idea of doing so fill you with terror? Leave us a comment below and let us know!

There are few pleasures in life as great as the one you feel when you travel. Imagine it right now: Packing up an old bag, booking the very next  flight, and jetting off into the sunset. If those words have your senses tingling, you’re not alone. Some of us have it in us; a pure love of the journeys we’ve yet to take. With that in mind, here are some quotes that will ignite your inner wanderlust.

1.  “There are no foreign lands. It is the traveler only who is foreign.” – Robert Louis Stevenson

Discovering new places is just part of the reason that people adore traveling. While some may see a world full of foreign scary places stretched out before them, there are others who see the great wonder that each place brings. The idea of spending time to truly get to know these new regions doesn’t fill them with fear, but excitement.

2.  “A journey is best measured in friends, rather than miles.” – Tim Cahill

Oh, and it’s not just about seeing new places and things; it’s about the people that you meet along the way. When you’re traveling around the globe, you’re likely to cross paths with people who you would never have met otherwise. These once-strangers are likely to come from different backgrounds, have different tales to tell, and share new things with you. When you come home, you have new friends around the world.

3.  “One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.” – Henry Miller

If you’ve traveled to any degree before now, you will know that it changes you in some small, yet fundamental way. All too often, people think that going to new places is just about seeing the sights and taking photos of tourist points. It’s not. What’s important about the act of adventuring is the many new perspectives it offers you.

4.  “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.” – Mark Twain

Here’s one for all the ladies out there who are continuously putting off their dreams of seeing the world. There really is no time like the present. The more you tell yourself that you’ll do these things ‘one day,’ the farther away that day will become. The very last thing you want is to look back on your life and regret the trips you never took.

5.  “Travel far enough, you meet yourself.” ― David Mitchell

It may sound a little corny, but it’s true. When you wander, the thing that you’re most likely to find is yourself. Often enough, when we lead busy lives, we fail to truly get to know ourselves on any real level. Simply getting away from it all and taking some time out from our everyday existences could be enough to change that.

6.  “People don’t take trips, trips take people.” – John Steinbeck

By the way, if you think you’re in control of your travels, you’re sadly mistaken. From the minute that you embark on a new journey, it takes a hold of you. The most wonderful thing about this experience is the fact that, for once in your life, you really don’t have a clue where things are headed. Instead, you’re letting yourself be carried along; it’s a truly refreshing state.

7.  “Traveling: it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.” — Ibn Battuta

Let’s not forget the greatest gift that travel affords you; the stories. You will never meet a boring person who has invested time in traveling. It’s just not possible. When a person has seen so much of what the planet has to offer, they have many things to share with each new friend that they meet along the way. Be that person. Be a storyteller.

8.  “Never go on trips with anyone you do not love.” — Ernest Hemingway

Make no mistakes, traveling with friends can be a tricky feat. You don’t want your journey to turn you into enemies. With that in mind, take note of this advice. Only travel with someone you truly love. That way, you won’t bicker, fight, or fall out with them. And if you’re not sure who you love right now, don’t be afraid to get out there alone. Fly solo.

9.  “Travel is never a matter of money but of courage.” – Paulo Coelho

Ladies who are put off traveling will often tell you that they don’t have the time or money to do so. Let’s be real; we all know that’s not the reason. To actually set your heart on traveling, be it alone or with others, you need a healthy helping of courage. No one wants to admit it, but traveling is seriously scary… and that’s just the thing that makes it so utterly exciting too.

10.  “I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.” – Susan Sontag

Finally, here’s a lesson in how we all ought to live. Forget having a limiting bucket list; you should aim to see as much of the world as you possibly can. Those who are natural wanderers will feel this statement more than most. Each day spent at home is wasted time; time that would be better spent journeying into foreign lands.

Beauty sleep — just another myth or a science-backed fact? Well, according to a recent study from The Royal Society, there could be more truth to the phrase than any of us imagine. While we already know that sleep deprivation can have some serious health ramifications, the research suggests that it may also affect how attractive you are.

As part of the study, 25 people were photographed over a two-day period and their sleep was restricted in that time. The pictures were then shown to over a hundred ‘raters’ who determined how attractive each person was in the image. They also rated the people in terms of ‘trustworthiness,’ ‘health,’ and ‘sleepiness.’

The results were striking! In the pictures where people had been deprived of their normal sleep, they were generally rated as less attractive, less healthy, and sleepier. So, what does this mean? Well, it’s pretty simple. The more sleep you get, the more beautiful people may perceive you to be.

How to get more beauty sleep

In the modern world, most of us have extremely busy lifestyles, which means that we struggle when it comes to getting the nightly rest that we need. If you wake up feeling sleepy, that’s a terrible way to start the day. Here are some tips that are certain to help you get more than just 40 winks per night.

1.  Turn off your gadgets

Tablets, phones, and laptops are your worst enemies when it comes to getting the right amount of sleep each night. If you’re in the habit of using these things in bed, it may well be time to stop. Back-lit items trick your brain into thinking that it’s daytime so you may struggle to snooze after using them.

2.  Cut out the coffee (in the afternoon!)

If you’re a full-on java fan, you may find the idea of avoiding coffee a little stressful. Maybe you should, though! The awake feeling that coffee gives you can last for up to six hours at a time. So, if you have a cup of Joe at 6pm, you may still feel awake at midnight. Yikes.

3.  Get some exercise

One of the main reasons that you may still be awake when you’re lying in bed is because you haven’t used much energy in the day. Heading to the gym before or after work may solve just this problem. Wearing yourself out could mean you catch some extra Z’s.

4.  Make sure your room is cool

If you’re hot and sticky at night, there’s just no way that you’re going to sleep well at all. You should try to keep your room cool at all times. In the summer, that may well mean cracking a window or turning on the AC. You might think you’re cozy in the heat, but it’s hindering your sleep.

5.  Hit the lights and draw the drapes

Oh, and it’s not just the temperature of the room that affects how well you sleep. If the room is too light, you may well find that it’s hard to get some kip. Either get an eye mask to shield you from the light or make the room as dark as possible.

6.  Eat earlier in the evening

The world is made up of two types of eaters — early birds and night owls. If you’re the latter, it could affect your sleep. Eating a large meal late at night is certain to keep you up. As your body starts to digest the food, you will feel more and more awake.

7.  Bathe before bed

Often enough, the reason that people struggle to sleep when they go to bed is because they have yet to unwind. This can be a real problem, especially if you’ve got a lot on your mind. Treat yourself to a relaxing soak in the tub an hour before bed.

8.  Try meditation too

If the bath isn’t enough to calm your worries, perhaps some meditation will help. Spending just ten minutes per day attempting to still your mind could make all the difference. There are plenty of resources online that will help you along the way.

9.  Keep things regular

If you don’t happen to have a regular sleep pattern, you will find it hard to drift off. Setting an alarm to go to bed and to get up each morning will help you keep to a tight schedule. Stick to this one enough and it will become your natural sleep pattern.

10.  Put your comfort first!

Finally, it should really go without saying that you need to be comfortable when you hit the hay. Making sure that your bed and mattress are right for you might be the last thing on your mind but these things matter. Taking the time to choose a mattress that suits your sleep style really is the best way forward.

Simply trying some of these tips may make all the difference when it comes to drifting off to the land of nod. Give them a try for yourself and see how it changes your nighttime routine! You might just be surprised by the results. After all, we all need our beauty sleep.

Featured image via Parfait

What helps you get a good night’s sleep? Tell us in the comments below!