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self esteem

Are you lacking self-esteem? You may think that outside influences – like other people or your bad hair day – are to blame, but what if they aren’t?

Here are some things you could be doing that affect your self-esteem negatively.

1.  Listening to gossip

Gossip may seem like no big deal, but it can be toxic in the long run. When you listen to people talking about others, it will start to have an impact on how you feel about yourself. The rationale here is quite simple. If they’re saying things about other people, you think, why on earth wouldn’t they be saying things about you too?

We all have friends who love nothing more than gossiping about everyone around them. The best thing you can do here is try as hard as you can to avoid getting involved in their conversations. Don’t let them drag you in.

2.  Negative self-talk

Forget what other people are saying about you – what are you saying about yourself? When you talk yourself down, it’s bound to have a negative effect on how you feel and what you do. It’s not okay. For example, the more you tell yourself that you hate the way your look, the more you will believe that it’s true. In the end, only you have the power to make things stop sooner rather than later.

3.  Taking comments personally

Do you recall that mean little comment a friend-of-a-friend said last week? If you tend to hold onto things and let them eat away at you, that’s a rather major problem. The truth of the matter is that a whole load of people don’t tend to think before they speak. They may not mean to come across as rude or hurtful, but it happens all the same.

Sadly, you really cannot control what the people around you say or do. It’s just not possible. What you can control, though, is how you react to it and what you do next. Stop overthinking the comment and move on.

4.  Social media use

Scrolling through social media aimlessly may feel like a fun pastime, but it could well be doing more harm than good. Looking at pictures of everyone you know looking blissfully happy and beautiful should make you feel the same. But it doesn’t. It’s easy to have some serious FOMO (fear of missing out!) when you see these things.

While coming off social media completely is unreasonable, you may want to consider just how much you use it. Limiting the time that you spend online could be a simple way to help you feel better in the long run. Why not try it?

Related: What Is A #PerfectFigure?

5.  Comparing yourself to others

Do you compare yourself to other people? That’s a silly question. We all do this from time to time, but it has to stop. When you look at another woman, the last thing that should be on your mind is whether or not she’s more attractive or smarter or happier than you are. Instead, focus on everything that you bring to the world and appreciate that everyone is different. It may feel hard at the start, but it could make all the difference here.

6.  Being a perfectionist

Nobody’s perfect. While you may think that other people out there are, you’re wrong. Everyone has flaws and that’s okay. If you hold yourself up to an unattainably high standard, you’re only setting yourself up for a fall. That means that you will ultimately end up feeling worse about yourself in the long run which just is not healthy. Avoid thinking that you have to be a perfect person. Accept your flaws and be the best version of yourself that you possibly can. Simple.

7.  Not eating or drinking properly

Sometimes, when we’re stressed, rushed, or just plain busy, we forget to give our body what it needs. Eating and drinking well is a sure fire way to make sure that you feel as good as you should on a day to day basis. You may not realize it, but when you forget to eat or don’t have something healthy, it affects your mental state just as much as your physical state. If you find it hard to eat a balanced diet, try keeping a notebook and writing down your meals. That way, you can see how what you eat affects how you feel.

8.  Overthinking things

Overthinking is a curse. If you spend too much of your time dissecting every single small thing that happens to you, it’s bound to make you feel conflicted and a little blue. Often enough, we get caught in thought patterns that we just can’t shake. When you catch yourself thinking the same thing over and over, you need to do something about it. Each time it happens, direct your thoughts somewhere else. In doing so, you should be able to stop yourself from overthinking each and every day.

When you practice self-care and avoid the pitfalls above, you should find that it makes a real difference to how you feel each day. Only you have control over your self-esteem. That’s why you need to do something about it when you’re feeling less than confident.

Related: How To Be Confident In Lingerie

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Charlotte Grainger

Charlotte Grainger is a freelance writer and digital journalist. Her main areas of interest are health, lifestyle, and relationships. When she’s not writing, she loves reading, gymming, and socializing.

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