The CrossFit Open – 5 surprise workouts over 5 weeks that will push your physical and mental limits.  A celebration of a sport that changes lives and bodies.  A worldwide competition open to the absolute beginner and the toughest on earth.  And above all else, to me, a reason to bring together our amazing team from Ariston CrossFit for a night of comradery, fun, determination, nerves and a whole lot of cheering!  The community is what makes CrossFit!  There will be shouting, grunting, hurting, sweating and laughing, and there will be crying.

This week was workout one (17.1) of the CrossFit Open, and she was pretty tough! A combined total of 150 dumbbell snatches and 75 burpee box overs with a 20-minute time cap.  I actually went into the WOD (workout of the day) fearing I was not going to be able to manage the prescribed dumbbell weight for the snatches, as I had a bit of a twinge at the bottom of my shoulder blade, and of course I was mindful of not over exerting my back.  I also had a slight concern about doing the box step overs with my shins being quite tender this week – thankyou shin splits!  Nevertheless, I was going to give it my best shot!

Credit: Krystal Gordon / Ariston Crossfit

Five minutes into the WOD, and none of my concerns were even a slight problem, but my foot was hurting like hell!  This issue popped up recently and I have been working with health professionals to address it, so I did have it strapped just in case this occurred.  I had also worn different shoes than I normally would, hoping they would prevent my shins from hurting (which I think worked) though in hindsight this may not have been the best idea, as I feel like my shoes may have contributed to my foot arch pain.  Regardless, it wasn’t a great position to be in right at that moment!  Fast forward another ten minutes and I could feel myself starting to wheeze and breathe very shallow – the start of a bloody asthma attack!  No way!  I haven’t had one in over 9 months! I stopped for a few seconds and was able to compose myself.  Thank goodness, I could breathe again!  By this stage I knew I wasn’t going to complete the WOD by cut off, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to stop either.

Credit: Krystal Gordon / Ariston Crossfit

As 20 mins approached, my breathing started to shallow again, I just couldn’t suck any air in. Shallow breathing then turned to panic and in that moment, I looked up to see my son in the crowd.  I was instantly overcome with emotion.  As the clock stopped and I kicked off my shoe, the tears started. Yes, I was hurting.  Yes, I was panicking due to struggling to get that air in my lungs.  But, more than anything else, I had just caught sight of the very reason I was at CrossFit to begin with.   The reason I push through the mental blocks.   The reason I push through the superficial ‘pain’.  The reason I won’t give up.  My son is the reason it is so important to me to continue gaining health and being the fittest, strongest and healthiest woman and mama I can be.   When you have lived majority of your life not caring for your health and body the way you should, carrying around shame, regret, embarrassment and fear, but now, here you are, doing hard things, being a good role model and honouring your body – it can be very emotional, and tears will sometimes fall…  Sometimes they tell of frustration and sometimes they tell of pride – but they will always tell a story.  There is no shame in crying, ever, and certainly not when you are out there giving something everything you’ve got!

How many times have you told yourself ‘right, I really am getting fat, I need to lose some weight!’? Or maybe a family member or close friend has gotten in your ear and hinted that perhaps you should think about losing a few pounds. I can completely understand that if you are feeling a little heavier than you want to, that you may like to do something about it, and you are certainly not alone! There is a good reason that the US weight loss market was worth approximately $60 billion in 2015! However, I’d love to propose that you consider flicking the phrase ‘losing weight’ to the curb, and here’s why!

Firstly, do you like to lose, in general?

Do you like to lose objects and things? I certainly don’t – how frustrating! And when you do lose things, do you hope to find them again? Think about that for a moment. Our brains are really clever at doing their job. If we tell them the same BS story for long enough, they will believe said BS. In fact, they will believe whatever they are told if repeated enough – but we must communicate in a clear and precise way! We need to really consider the language and way in which we talk to ourselves. If you are constantly talking about wanting to lose weight due to being fat, all that will be heard is the focus around your weight and being fat. Is that what you want to focus on?

Related: 8 Body Positive Podcasts Every Woman Should Hear

Secondly, do you want to lose weight, or do you want to release it?

I know that I am carrying around a few extra protective pounds and I sure as hell don’t want it to return once it is gone! I don’t want to lose it on the off chance it finds its way back – I want to release it, set it free! A simple change in the words we use (and tell ourselves) can have a very profound effect!

Now, do you want to lose, or release, weight? Or release fat?

Because there is a huge difference! Weight loss and fat loss are very different things. You could easily ‘lose some weight’ by decreasing your muscle mass or releasing some water weight, or chopping off a leg! But that is not going to improve your health. So, is it really weight loss that you are searching for? Here’s my 2 cents worth – change your thoughts to change your outcome. Change your focus and the story you are telling yourself and great results will follow. Instead of focusing on wanting to ‘lose weight’, how about you instead switch your focus to gaining health!

Related: 5 Tips For Feeling Super Confident In Your Lingerie

Final thoughts

When you put a positive spin on those thoughts, and you are now focusing on gaining health and all the ways you can do this, you are sending a fabulous message to your brain and body. You are sending a great message to the universe so she can help deliver what you desire. By concentrating on adding in the ‘good stuff’, or elements of improving your health, the ‘bad stuff’, including the fat you want to release, will deplete over time and sort itself out. The more positive stuff you can add in, the less room there is for the negative. There is only room for so much ‘stuff’! Don’t focus on wanting to lose weight gorgeous – instead, gain health!

Once upon a time I used to weigh myself very regularly – at least every day, and often multiple times a day.  I used to wake up in the morning and jump straight on, determining whether I would have a good or bad day based on what that little box told me.

If the outcome was a favourable one I would praise myself and reaffirm that my worth was based on a number.  If the outcome was not so great that day, I would set about a plan of attack (aka deprivation) to ensure it was different tomorrow, and so the merry go round continued.  Fuck that.  What was I thinking?  The same as millions of other women across the world so it would seem!

The plateau

In 2015 I started CrossFit and as the weeks and months passed by I was feeling great, the fittest (and slimmest) I ever had been in my adult life.  I started springing out of bed and almost running to the scales for my daily dose of ‘Fuck I’m good’ when I saw that number go down.  All was going great!  Then one day I jumped on to find the number had gone up. Up!  What!?  It was all good though – obviously, it was just my period, or weighing at the wrong time of day, or I had too much water beforehand.  It would be going down again before I knew it.  Except it didn’t…

Over the next few weeks, I found my weight slightly increasing, or plateauing.  I also found my self-worth plummeting.   I cut back my portion sizes and worked harder at CrossFit, but the numbers on the scales were relentless – they weren’t going down! I decided to go and have a body composition scan.  I had one done a few months earlier when I joined CrossFit and I was interested to see just how much weight I had lost since then.  As the lady handed me my results after the scan, and I ran my eyes over the sheet of paper in my hand, I was shocked to see what had occurred.  I was gaining muscle baby!  No, my weight had not been changing over the previous few weeks, but damn was I growing some strong arms and legs!  My body fat percentage had decreased dramatically despite the scales taunting me for not losing any weight for a number of weeks.

In that moment, I realised that I had been torturing myself.

Your weight does NOT define you

I had been allowing myself to get sucked into a number that was nothing more than my gravitational force!  This number did not define me.  It did not accurately reflect the commitment and effort I had put into improving my health.  It did not determine my worth.  The scales had to go!

From that day forward, I have realised that fat loss is far superior to weight loss.  I have discovered that there are much better ways to physically measure your progress that do not involve a set of scales.  I have reminded myself, constantly, that I am so much more than my weight.  If you are reading this thinking ‘I really need to break up with my scales’, I say please, go ahead and break up!

Related: 10 Negative and Harmful Things You Need To Stop Telling Yourself

Ditch the scale

If you still want to measure your progress that is perfectly okay, but please try one of these four methods instead!

1.  Take photos to record your progress.

Photos are a fabulous way to see change in your body.  Take a full body shot in your underwear and add a date to the picture for future reference!

2.  Record your measurements.

Grab a tape measure and record your measurements for your bust, waist and hips at a minimum.  You will be surprised to see how these numbers change.

3.  Dress up.

Most of us have a special outfit in our wardrobe that is just a little too tight.  Pull it out, see how it feels when on (perhaps take a picture!) and repeat the process in 3 or 6 months time!

4.  Find out what you are made of.

Earlier I mentioned having a body composition scan done.  This involves laying on a bed that takes an image of your body, identifying your muscle and fat weight (and bone density) for each limb and body region.  This is an amazing way, particularly for those participating in sport or fitness, to track their body changes.

Related: 10 Reasons To Adore Your Body

Please don’t put yourself through the hell I went through.  You are so much more than a number on a box.  Ditch the scales honey!

I was chatting to a friend the other week and I asked her how she was going.  She replied with ‘good, but I have fallen off the wagon again’.  That damn wagon!  You know the one, no doubt you’ve had a ride.  I know I’ve ridden it and fallen off it dozens of times in the past.  But do you want to know a secret?  I no longer ride it.  It is too bumpy, I feel too pressured to hold on, and then it really hurts when I fall off.  Unless you have named your husband ‘Wagon’, don’t ride it baby!  It is merely a high expectation of how we think we should do something – usually used in reference to a regimen of self-improvement, such as dieting or exercise. So, to stop falling off, don’t jump on to begin with!

When we make the conscious decision to live wagon free, knowing that we will, on occasion, dip and sway and ebb and flow, we give ourselves permission to just be.  We give ourselves permission to take each day for what it is, as it comes, rather than collectively piecing together a long track that we feel pressured to stay on.  Again, we all know how much it hurts when we come off the rails right?  Fuck the wagon, fuck the rails.  The Urban Dictionary defines the idiom falling off the wagon as ‘when one resumes an addictive/compulsive behavior that they are trying to control’.  Funnily enough when we stop trying to control everything, we usually gain more freedom, acceptance and happiness than we thought possible.  By giving up control, we are giving ourselves permission to just be.  By letting ourselves simply be, we remove judgement and unrealistic expectations that we have placed upon ourselves, so when things do go a little pear shaped or unexpected perhaps we can instead observe, learn something from it and keep moving forward.  No painful falls required!

Next time you feel like you are ‘falling off the wagon’, just remember that you can only fall off if you decided to jump on in the first place.  Remind yourself that you are exactly where you are meant to be in this moment, and things are playing out exactly as they should.  Expectation is the root of heartache, so give yourself permission to ebb and flow gorgeous, dip and sway.  Life is a lot less painful, and a whole lot happier that way.

I love Valentine’s Day.  A know a lot of people who say it is over-commercialized and silly to only declare your love to your partner on one day of the year.  And if that was all valentine’s day was about, I would agree.  But to me, it is more, and that is the joy about celebrations – they are what we make of them.  I don’t know the specific origins or history behind this holiday, but I do know it is about celebrating love and friendships.  To me, Valentine’s Day is a reminder to be grateful for those around us and to simply do all things with love.  It is one day a year in amongst our busy lives to stop and really think about why we appreciate our loved ones.  It is a mark on the calendar that reminds us to not just feel, but openly declare our love for those that mean the most to us – significant others, family, close friends, children etc.  In addition to that, it is also simply another day in which we have the opportunity to spread love to others, including those we may not even know, and to mindfully nurture the love we have for ourselves.

There are hundreds of ways you can celebrate Valentine’s Day with your partner, but have you ever thought about doing something for you, or a stranger, on Feb 14?  Of course, you could buy yourself some flowers or a nice outfit, but what about something a little deeper?  I have popped together a handful of unorthodox valentine’s day gifts for yourself and strangers – enjoy love bug!

FOR YOU

Book in for a pap smear, breast screen or skin check!  Romantic eh?  Seriously though, when was the last time you had your gorgeous body checked out?

Oh, that long ago?

It’s definitely time to make that appointment!

FOR THEM

Donate blood or plasma, or join the organ donor registry.  Your selfless gift could save a stranger’s life one day.

For the sake of a quick registration, or a short visit to your local blood bank, you really could change someone’s life!

FOR YOU

Create a plaster cast, or other visual art project, of your body to celebrate it in all its divine feminine glory.  Get your creative on.  Reconnect with yourself.

Make it a beautiful, fun and sacred experience to remember for years to come!

FOR THEM

Volunteer or participate in a random act of kindness!  This could be as big or small as you choose.

You may be able to volunteer your time at a local soup kitchen for the homeless, or you could choose to pay for a coffee for the person behind you.

No matter the gesture, you will be sure to help put a smile on someone else’s face!

Remember, Valentine’s day is what you make of it.  Absolutely remind your loved ones how amazing they are and how lucky you are to have them in your life, but be sure to show that same love and appreciation to yours truly. And while you’re at it, make a stranger’s day too!  Happy Valentine’s Day beautiful!

Featured Lingerie:

Parfait Kitty Babydoll 2108 in Red/Black

Parfait Kitty Hipster 2105 in Red/Black

Today, as I write this, it is my Daddy’s birthday. He would have been 57 years old. 5 years ago we were watching him blow out his candles.  I’m pretty sure the cake was pink, because he didn’t believe in eating blue food and the bakery only sold either blue ‘boys’ cakes, or pink ‘girls’ ones. So, pink it was!  Less than 6 weeks later he would be gone. Just like that. Forever. It was devastating, hard to believe and heartbreaking.  Really heartbreaking.  And not just the dying part, but the days leading to his death that just smothered your heart like thick smoke, making it hurt until you cried.  And then you would sit there for days upon days wondering how your body could actually make so many tears!  It’s quite unbelievable!  5 years on it is still tough.  People think you should ‘get over it’ or maybe not even be so upset about it in the first place.  Who am I to act so distraught.  He wasn’t my child, or life partner.  He was my parent, a sick parent at that.  Parents are meant to die before their children, right?  And because he battled a terminal illness, it should have been expected at some point, right?  No, no that is not right…

I used to speak to him on the phone nearly every day.  Maybe for a minute, maybe for an hour.  He never judged me.  He always had the right words.  Nothing but pure love and adoration came from him and as selfish as it is, that is definitely one of the things I miss the most. Sure, he didn’t always agree with my big ideas or choices I made (yes, I am still sorry for defacing my body with tattoos Dad lol), but he always supported me through them regardless.  Always.  And he made me laugh like no one else.  Oh, how he made me laugh.  The #funnynotfunny Dad jokes, his quick wit and inappropriate humour.  Far out was he funny! Today I was thinking about how he used to ring and leave voicemail messages on my phone, singing Stevie Wonder’s ‘I Just Called to Say I Love You’.  And let me tell you, he was no singer lol.  But to hear the man that forever holds your heart on the other end of the line, gasping for air between most words because he literally could not catch his breath (fuck you pulmonary fibrosis), yet still singing on because he KNEW how much it made your day, that was truly special.  And for moments like that I know exactly how lucky I am to have called him my father and to have had the bond that we had….

Credit: Krystal Gordon

Much of what he did was special, or hilariously ridiculous – one of the two! I’ve never seen someone so sick, in so much pain and discomfort, yet who laughed and poked fun at their situation so much. Despite it all, he remained grateful.  He always said things could be worse, and that there was always someone out there doing it tougher than he was – he would proclaim to be one of the luckiest guys on earth.  His attitude to life was an admirable one, so much so that at his funeral he wanted us to play Monty Python’s ‘Always Look on the Bright Side of Life’.  Inappropriate for a funeral some may so, but it couldn’t have been more perfect for his.

He always had a great way of looking at things.  The tattoos I mentioned above – he would tell me that I was so absolutely perfect exactly the way I was, every freckle, every curl, that I need not make any changes to my appearance – particularly permanent ones lol.  As a young girl, he, along with my Mum, would tell me that the grades I got at school weren’t important, but the comments the teacher’s wrote about my behaviour and effort did.  As I grew up and faced tough decisions about life and my career, I would always talk them through with him.  He would tell me that I already knew the answers, I just had to listen and trust my instincts.  And if that failed I should perhaps write out a positive and negative table regarding the scenario at hand – full of wisdom he was!  So wise! And funny – did I mention that already?

So, 5 years on and grief comes and goes like a pet cat – one minute it is right there sitting on your chest, and the next minute it walks away, but not before flicking you with it’s tail.  And then it’s back trying to sit over your face while you feel like you are suffocating beneath it.  You know when you go for a swim in the ocean and you are frolicking in the water, calmly minding your own business, and the next minute a wave comes crashing down and you feel yourself getting pulled under?  In an instant you go from bobbing along with the tide feeling like all is going okay (even if your feet slip from time to time), to being sucked under, further and further down, drowning and feeling like you won’t make it back up.  That is grief.  Grief is a bitch.  Like everything, there is a positive though.  To experience these feelings means that at some point you were unbelievably blessed to have a very special person in your life – whether that was for a short time or a lifetime.  Not everyone is so lucky, and for that you should be grateful.  When it all feels too much, and I feel that wave of grief coming, I sit, and I reflect, and I remember to be grateful.  Truly truly grateful.  Not only for all the amazing moments and memories and the relationship we had, but for the gifts I was given throughout these tough times – the lessons, the self-discovery, the altered appreciation for life.  Grief is a bitch, but gratitude prevails.  Happy birthday Daddy…

Credit: Krystal Gordon

When we decide to set a goal, it is so easy to become focused on that end result, that we forget to celebrate the journey along the way.  We think that success, or happiness, lies within that result, but perhaps that actually comes from an accumulation of wonderful moments created during the journey.  These moments should be acknowledged and celebrated exactly for what they are, rather than glossed over as a mere stepping stone to your goal.

Think about a goal you have had in the past – maybe related to fitness, or studying or creativity.  How long did it take you to reach your goal?  Months, years?  That’s a long time to stay focused without a little party along the way!  How many times did you need to take a leap of faith and do something outside your comfort zone in order to up level your experience?  That shit almost needs balloon and streamers! How many people did you meet along the way that encouraged you, supported you or taught you something – good or otherwise?  I bet there have been a few! How about ‘failure’ – how many times did you fall and get back up again?  For the record, I don’t believe in failure, only feedback and lessons!  Every one of these things took patience and courage.  Every one of these things deserves to be celebrated.

Sure, finally zipping up that dress that has taken you two years to fit into deserves one hell of a celebration – you did it!  But how about a round of applause for every time you rose before the sun did so you could get to the gym and move your body?  Dedication my friend – celebrate it!  How about a round of applause for the woman who always seemed to be driving into the parking lot as you were driving out, but thanks to you changing your routine one day, you now call her your best friend? Friendship and support – celebrate it!  What about those endless hours researching nutrition and teaching yourself how to cook, with way too many meals than you would like to admit ending up in the bin as flops along the way, simply so you could confidently cook fresh and wholesome meals to fuel your body?  Knowledge and skills baby – celebrate them!

Don’t get so caught up in the end result that you miss the journey getting there.  That journey is what makes you.  Be proud of all the small choices you make along the way – they are so rewarding!   Ultimately, they shape you and your outcome!  Celebrate them baby, and enjoy the ride!

As technology and science continue to evolve, we are finding more and more beauty products filling the shelves.  From winding back the aging clock to providing pouty lips, there is a product for everything!  A few years ago I participated in a low-toxic living program and learnt more than I ever could have imagined.  It doesn’t take a rocket science to know that many chemicals are not great for us, but when you discover just how harmful they can be (I’m talking hormone disruption, cancer etc), and just how many of these harmful chemicals we subject ourselves to daily, it’s only natural that you start to take action and look for better alternatives. I started that process by looking in my bathroom and noting what I put on my skin.  From creams to makeup, soaps and perfumes – the list is long gorgeous!

For just a moment, think about how effective a small nicotine patch is that people use when they quit smoking – they are not ingested, they are simply placed on the skin!  Our skin is our largest organ and much of what we put on it is absorbed by our bodies, entering our bloodstream.  That is precisely why it pays to know what is in the products you are using!  I have three tips to help you do this.

1.  Use products you have in your kitchen!

Credit: Pixabay / Kerdkanno

Coconut oil, honey and sugar all play a part in my beauty routine these days.  From moisturizing to exfoliating your kitchen may have you covered!  There are plenty of great ideas on Pinterest and google to help in the DIY non-toxic arena.

2.  Shop via a store or website that takes all the guess work out for you.

Credit: Nourished Life

My personal favorite is Nourished Life – I order majority of my personal products from this site! They research each and every product before stocking it to ensure the ingredients are all non-toxic.

3.  Use a handy app such as Chemical Maze.

Credit: Gridstone

This app allows you to enter the name of an ingredient and learn how it is derived, what it is typically used for and what the possible effects are from using it.

Now, to get you started, here are 5 of my favorite non-toxic beauty must haves!

1.  Weleda Skin Food Cream

This moisturizer for dry or rough skin is magic. I have a tube in my bathroom, in my desk drawer and a travel size in my handbag.  Free from parabens, artificial preservatives, colours and fragrances, the same formula has been used since the 1920’s!  This cream is perfect for hands, knees, elbows, or even dry skin on the face.

2.  Bite Beauty Amuse Bouche lipstick

I have tried a number of non-toxic lipsticks, and Bite is definitely one of my favorite brands.  Their lipsticks are handcrafted in Canada using food grade ingredients including a doxen edible oils.  Available in over 30 colors, and paraben, sulfate and phthalates free, this is a great hydrating lippie! My favorite color at the moment is ‘gingersnap’.

3.  Lavera Powder Rouge

This rouge (AKA blush) was one of the very first non-toxic products I ever tried, and one I still use now.  It only comes in two colors but with soothing organic ingredients, hydrating oils and natural mineral pigments it certainly gives you a beautiful healthy glow!

4.  100% Pure Brightening Cleanser

100% Pure is my staple beauty brand.  I use and love many their products, but their cleanser is a stand out for me.  Not only are their products non-toxic and cruelty free, but their packaging is recycled, which I love.  This cleanser uses a host of natural ingredients that safely lighten and brighten the skin, such as licorice, sake, kojic acid and sake.  It removed makeup effortlessly and leaves your skin feeling fresh.

5. W3LL PEOPLE Expressionist mascara

This beautiful mascara glides on nicely giving you bold eyelashes with no clumps!  Of course, this botanical blend product is cruelty and paraben free, as well as coal, aluminum and petroleum free.  It is the blackest of black mascaras and it stays put nicely, unlike a couple of other non-toxic brands I have tried that left me looking like a panda within an hour!

If you have a favorite non-toxic beauty buy we want to hear about it!  Leave us a comment below.  Happy shopping gorgeous!

{Editor’s Note: This post is not sponsored by or affiliated with any of the brands or businesses in this post.}

Have you ever had one of those days where you feel like you are carrying the world on your shoulders and it is all just becoming a little too heavy?  You know you are strong, but man are you exhausted!  Your Mum is having an argument with your Aunty so of course you will be there to lend a shoulder – 4 times in one night.  Your best friend is having a tough time as a new Mum so you will absolutely whip her up some meals and stop by to tidy up and give her a break.  Work is off the hook and you won’t think twice about staying back tonight, again.

Speaking of tonight, you better message your cousin and let her know that you will be late picking up your niece for dancing, but still, you said you would do it so you will.  Somewhere in amongst all that crazy you need to find time to cook dinner, spend some quality time with your child and chat about their school day, and of course check in with hubby for a cuddle and to see how his day was.  Oh, and perhaps you need to shower, eat and sit for 5 minutes… Until someone needs you that is!

Life can be busy, right?  It can be demanding, and it can be exhausting.  I think sometimes as women, as Moms, as friends, partners and employees, we want to help everyone.  Occasionally we may feel obligated to do so, but more often it is because we care.  We genuinely want to be there to let people know we have their back, to share some of their burden, make them smile and lighten their load. But, who has your back?  Maybe you have a special friend or family member that ‘gets’ you and is there when you need them too.  But maybe you don’t?  Then what?  You NEED someone to have your back.  You need someone to keep you grounded and to support you.  Sometimes that person needs to be YOU.  Yes, YOU!

Most of us have become proficient at physically supporting ourselves, but we often neglect taking care of ourselves emotionally.  Here are some quick tips for those times when you are emotionally exhausted and need to look within for support.

• Think about what you so willingly do for others, and ensure you give yourself the same gifts – asking questions, listening and validating feelings are a great place to start.
• Know that it is okay to say no or share the load. In the nature of wanting to help others or even avoiding conflict, we often say yes yes yes, even when we desperately want to say no.  How does that make you feel deep inside?  What message is it sending to yourself?
• Stop and take some time for you. Immerse yourself in music, the ocean, a solo lunch date, meditation – whatever clears your mind and fills your soul with love.  Don’t forget to breathe.  Sometimes a few long deep breaths can change your whole day!
• Remember we all have limits. Respect yours, and don’t supersede them for the sake of preserving someone else’s.  You are no good to anyone if you push yourself past breaking point!

You are a beautiful glimmering light.  Do not let the weight of the world dull your sparkle beautiful.  Support you first and foremost.  Have you own back.  Then, and only then, let the overflow of your bright spark filter into others’ lives.

How many times have you said ‘one day I will do x, when x happens’?  One day when?  Why then and not now?  I have decided that this is the year I am going to ‘stuff’.  All the things I have said I will do one day, are happening now…  One day I am going to join dancing – one day when I lose 10kg so I don’t stand out as the ‘big’ girl in the class that is.  One day I am going to wear an outfit that shows a little bit of skin between the top of the skirt and the bottom of the crop – one day when I think I have enough confidence to do so that is.  One day I am going to buy myself nice lingerie.  One day when I feel worthy enough that is.  Sound familiar?  We get caught up in this fairytale of one day when, and the truth is, that ‘one day’ often never comes.

Wishing for something, or waiting for one day when, simply isn’t enough to make your wants a reality.  Firstly, you need to believe you deserve whatever it is you want, and then ask the universe to deliver.  Obviously, you also need to take action!  You need to align yourself with your goal or desire – act as if you are already that person you want to be, even if you aren’t!  Our futures are a result of our present, right?  If what you want doesn’t exist now in some way, shape or form, then it most likely never will!  You need to take action to make it happen!  

Now, I am not suggesting that if you are currently a clerk but you want to be a rally car driver that you need to quit your job today and jump behind the wheel of a rally car or it will never happen.  But, I am saying that you need to take a step in the right direction. In this case, it might be learning how to drive, or joining a rally club.  Alternatively, if you want to wear a bikini at the beach ‘one day’ but just can’t bring yourself to do it just yet, make a step towards being that woman you want to be.  You could start by buying the damn bikini!  You could start treating your body the way you think you would when you are that woman that you think you want to be.  The more steps you take towards the things you want, the easier they will become and the more aligned to your goals and desires you will be.  When you start to live your life as the person you want to be, rather than waiting to become them, your confidence will soar and you will find a new thirst for things you enjoy!

If you hope to do something or have something in your life one day, you should at least have a bit of it in your life right now, today.  Don’t just set goals, but live them in some small way right now, today.  Start with something small that you have been putting aside for ‘one day’ and see where it takes you.  I am taking pottery classes – all booked in! I am going on a holiday (and wearing my damn bikini when I do it!) – deposit paid!  And, I am joining dancing again – I have my shoes ready!  After years of putting these things off until ‘one day when’ I am making them happen!  One day is never promised after all!  What are you going to do today?  If not today, then when?